Disgusting Guinness Commercial

A facebook friend posted this video on his wall. He wrote "best. video. ever" next to the link. I strongly disagreed.



This ad is actually incredibly offensive. I'm all for sexy advertising but there's nothing sexy or appealing about a women being portrayed as a silent beer coasters while three men(?) drink off of her. I think what bothered me most, though was the text: "Share one with a friend"... seriously? That's such blatant objectification. It portrays women as no better than beer, serving the mere purpose of entertaining men as they bond while they fuck us. Eww. The supposed sex here bothers me, too. It's clearly not good sex (based on the woman's only slight movements) and portrays the woman as nothing more than a body for three others to fuck, which is disgusting and not sexually empowering whatsoever.

Sexism is alive and well in this ad. If nothing else we have to admit that advertisements serve to sell more than the product they are promoting. If that wasn't the case, why would they use hot, half naked women to get products noticed? Advertisements also sell concepts of normalcy, and in this case, create a culture where it's not only ok but sexy to objectify women, use them solely for the purpose of male bonding and beer drinking, and "share them" with their friends. Women (people in general) deserve better than this.

I objected to the link. I posted an explanation underneath it to which many people replied that i was being overly liberal, overly sensitive, and unable to take a joke. Then someone compared this commercial to this Calvin Kline ad of David Becham modeling underwear. The guy was clearly misunderstanding the definition of "objectification." The term is used to signify when a person is seen purely to serve a purpose and their attributes and appearance are separated from the rest of their worth to reduce that person to an instrument (or object) solely for the pleasure or use of another person. When men are photographed half naked (as in that ad) men aren't objectified in the same way women are everyday due to the social context. We live in a country where women are second class citizens and commercials like the Guinness one only serve to perpetuate and glamorize that status.

Research just this year found that men are more likely to think of women as objects if they viewed pictures of stereotypically sexy women beforehand. "Researchers used brain scans to show that when straight men looked at pictures of women in bikinis, areas of the brain that normally light up in anticipation of using tools, like spanners and screwdrivers, were activated. Scans of some of the men found that a part of the brain associated with empathy for other peoples' emotions and wishes shut down after looking at the pictures. Susan Fiske, a psychologist at Princeton University in New Jersey, said the changes in brain activity suggest sexy images can shift the way men perceive women, turning them from people to interact with, to objects to act upon."

Must Reads

Two news articles that you should check out:

Governor Schwarzenegger cuts 100% of the domestic violence budget in California.

&

The issue of school and education for girls under Taliban rule.

Vulgar Email

I was waiting for an important email this morning, so when my computer beeped to indicate I had a new message, I naturally got excited. This wasn't the email I was hoping for, however. I opened the message, titled, "your friend recommended this article" (because it isn't abnormal for friends to send me articles to read and write about here). But that's not what it was...

The message read:

Enter her twat like a bull

Smart men prefer this solution for giving girls true satisfaction!

SERIOUSLY?!

There is so so much wrong with that. And I get it, spam emails aren't intended to be works of Jane Austen. But for some reason what bothered me most about this particular message was that "smart men prefer this solution for giving girls true satisfaction." Men really shouldn't be entering girls' "twats" like bulls (or in any other way, either...). Ew.

Platonic Friendship

Can men and women be (just) friends?

I first began thinking about this question years ago after watching the quirky and timeless classic, When Harry Met Sally. The movie revolves around the idea that men and women can never be just friends because "the sex part always gets in the way." They try to navigate through the conversation by setting obscure rules like they can only be friends if both are in committed relationships because then "the pressure of possible involvement is lifted."

Aside from being a heteronormative question, assuming that all men are attracted to women, it is also a question engrossed in strict gender roles and stereotypes. For these two reasons I hoped this would cease to be debated in 2009, when apparently we live in a post feminist society where men and women are equal and free thinking... (that was snark if you couldn't tell).

Fast forward to today as I engaged in my sleepy morning let's-get-the-day-started routine, pouring coffee and turning on the often trite Good Morning America. In the segment I linked they too discuss this "timeless question" of an impossible platonic friendship between men and women. The segment was an obvious scheme to promote Steve Harvey's new book, Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man (which i won't link because of the strict gender roles and stereotypes that even the title doesn't fail to perpetuate). For 'empirical evidence' GMA referenced a study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology that found that an opposite sex friendship can end in an affair 15% of the time. (emphasis mine.) What about the other 85% of the time? That sure doesn't seem like enough statistical evidence to back up the claim to me...

The whole "timeless question" leaves me more than prickly. It assumes that men can't think with their appropriate brain and that they are sexually attracted to every woman they meet. It also ascertains that women are 1) naive and 2) not sexually driven. This sort of thinking is damaging for men because it sets men up to be the ultimate perpetrators. They are always on the prowl and are singly sex minded. It promotes the idea that it's always a man's responsibility to get into a woman's pants and it's solely a woman's role to guard her virginity, pureness, sex, whatever.

For women it's a double whammy. Not only are women once again regarded as naive, helpless, and meek, doing whatever they can to protect their one and only precious commodity, but they are determined to not have the same sex drive that their male counterparts posses.

Continuing to think in the heteronormative way in which this question is presented, I think that mature and responsible men and women can absolutely have platonic relationships that don't deteriorate into a let's rip each other's clothes off and make passionate love in the bedroom situation. I think the dynamic between opposite sex friends has to be different, and that your partners have to be involved in the friendship (for example, it shouldn't be a secret friendship because that sets up a sketchy relationship from the beginning). But all in all, i think it is entirely possible for heterosexual men and women to have close friends of the opposite sex.

Readers, what do you think?

(cross-posted at feministing community where there is some discussion going on in the comments sections)

The Latest for Afghan Women

Afghanistan passes 'barbaric' law diminishing women's rights: "Rehashed legislation allows husbands to deny wives food if they fail to obey sexual demands."

A new law was recently passed in Afghanistan that allows Shia men to deny their wives food if their wives refuse their husbands' sexual demands. Another element of this new legislation grants full guardianship of children to their father exclusively.

Human Rights Watch noted that these laws contradict Afghanistan's constitution and called on leaders to repeal the new legislation.

Worried about being a sweaty bride??

I was taking a hiatus from blogging, but then i got this in an email from TheKnot and couldn't resist writing about it:

Subject: Worried about sweating excessively on your wedding day?

"BOTOX® is approved by the FDA as a treatment for excessive underarm sweating when antiperspirants fail. There are enough things to worry about on your wedding day! Sweat stains on your wedding dress should not be one of them!"

REALLY!? So TheKnot recommends brides to inject a toxin into their bodies so that they do not sweat on their wedding day? God forbid...

More Racially Charged Police Brutality?

An ambulance being driven by a black EMT "failed to yield" to two white police officers. Why does the skin color of the men involved matter? Because after you watch this video, you might agree that this "confrontation" (as the news gingerly calls it) may have been racially motivated.


The cop grabbed the EMT driver by the throat... how is that appropriate? The EMT driver calmly discusses that he is transporting a patient to the hospital... the trooper doesn't seem to care much about anything but punishing the EMT driver.

Here is the clip i saw this morning on the news:




In light of all the racially motivated police brutality recently, this one shouldn't go unmentioned.

June 15th is "National Man Day"

Apparently today is "National Man Day" according to two Indiana brothers. The Longanecker boys declared June 15th to be a day for men to "stand up and do manly things" and reclaim their masculinity. The brothers are spreading their message using facebook that encourages men to participate in "manly things" today. What are these "many things" you may ask? Well according to these boys manly activities include:

• being left alone by your woman (no chores, no telling you to be home by dinner time, no helping with the kids, and no "honey do" lists!)
• sitting in your favorite chair and scratching yourself
• shooting stuff or blowing something up
• eating steak
• shooting animals
• punching someone in the face

(sic)

From their facebook group:

On June 15th, men across the nation will unite in one cause and one voice saying, 'I am man!'On that day, men across the nation will blow things up, they'll shoot big guns, they'll punch each other for no reason, they'll pump some iron, or they'll watch every Rambo movie from beginning to end. Straight through. And when asked why we do these things, we'll say 'Because I'm a MAN!' Since when has there been a time when that answer to a question has was unacceptable? Since when has being a man been lame? Since men have let down their guard and become sissies. It's time to take back the crown of masculinity.

It's time for men to be men.What should you do on this day? Be the man God made you to be. Be a good father, drop kick your best friend when he least expects it, dump a whole tank of gasoline on a pile of sticks and ignite it by shooting another can of gas! Be responsible for your actions, go out there invite every man you know, eat an 18 oz steak, get your wife some flowers, punch another guy in the jugular and be a MAN!

Hey at least "be a good father" made the list??

As laughable as all this may seem, there is a serious and growing problem with what young boys are taught about masculinity. Patriarchy, sexism, and "machismo" culture are just as damaging for men and boys as they are for women. For example, boys learn the type of masculinity that the Longanecker brothers are advocating at a young age are are rewarded for being tough, macho, and strong in the physical sense. This also teaches them that being a “real man” is associated with violence, power, and control. The consequences of this are not only great for women (due to increased instances of rape, sexual harassment, domestic violence, and physical abuse) but also for men who are often violent against other men. Men commit the majority of violent acts in this country, towards both women AND men because they are taught early on that they are being "manly" by doing so.

There are many wonderful groups forming that teach the type of masculinity that empowers young men in ways other than through violence. These groups embrace inward evaluation, compassion, bounding, and positive contribution to the community.

Check out these sites for more info and please leave others in comments if you know of more: V-Men, Homeboy Industries, and MAVAW

IntelliGender

A new over-the-counter product called IntelliGender can possibly predict the sex of an unborn fetus as early as 10 weeks old.

It claims that within 10 minutes of taking the urine test, a woman will be able
to tell her baby's gender. The specimen will turn green if it's a boy, and
orange if it's a girl.

A product like this has serious implications in countries (and families) where one sex is preferred over another. 10 weeks is early enough to terminate the pregnancy, and the thought that this product may aid in abortions based on the sex of a child is more than troublesome. For example, China's preference for male babies is ingrained in both culture and politics. At one point the Chinese government set into place a one-child-only policy as an attempt to target overpopulation which significantly increased the number of female infanticides. The Communist Party took power in 1949 and outlawed this practice. However, in the 1980's the Chinese government census continued to show hundreds of thousands of missing baby girls each year. The practice of female infanticide in China is most prevalent in rural areas where boys are valued for their ability to help with the land and take care of their parents later on in life. Girls, however, traditionally move in with their in-laws and cannot further help their birth family. Baby girls are often "abandoned, suffocated, or drowned soon after birth." Aside from being an inhuman, unethical, and sexist practice, female infanticide effects the Chinese culture in many ways, "in 1997 the London Telegraph quoted ...a Chinese journal... which warned the male-to-female ratio in China has become so unbalanced that there will soon be an 'army of bachelors' in China - an estimated 90 million Chinese men in search of a spouse." Female infanticide is an old practice dating back to 200 B.C. in Greece. It still exists today mostly cited in China and India.

The makers of IntelliGender state they will not be distributing to China and India. Still, products like these terrify me. It makes me feel like we are one step closer to being able to generate our "ideal" child.

At least it turns orange and green rather than pink and blue? Oh for small victories...

Thanks, Joanne, for sending this over and pointing out the "i need it right now" instant world we currently live in.

Friday Feel Good: New Hampshire Legalizes Same-Sex Marriage

Now New Hampshire can really proclaim the right to "live free or die!"

Friday Feel Good: Gay Penguin Couple Adopt & Hatch Egg

Via BBC News and Edge:

A pair of male penguins in a German zoo have taken in an egg that was rejected by its biological parents, hatched the egg, and now are rearing the chick, according to a June 3 article carried at BBC News.

Such behavior is not unknown. In many animal species, from fruit flies to birds to primates, same-gender sexual contact and social bonding (including long term pair bonding) have been observed.

In the case of Z and Vielpunkt, two penguins at the zoo in Bremerhaven, the pair had been observed attempting to hatch a stone. When a male-female pair of penguins at the zoo rejected their own egg, keepers gave it to Z and Vielpunkt, who tended and hatched the egg and now, a month after its hatching, continue to care for the chick.

"I was going to ask you what's new, but I think I know"

Anyone watch American Idol? This is extremely disturbing to me on so, so many levels...

Actually, Yes. That WAS Racist...

I was eating lunch last week with some of the counselors at the clinic. The Chinese food arrived and they were passing it around to everyone who had ordered. As they passed it to one woman, she exclaimed, "if I eat any more Chinese food this week my eyes are gonna slant!"

I turned to her, astonished, and said, "wow, I haven't heard a racial slur like that in a long time."

"That wasn't racist!" she demanded.

"Actually, Yes. it was. When you mock an already marginalized group of people based on their appearance, that's racist. You stereotyped a population based on physical attributes..." I retorted. She snarled at me and proceeded to eat her egg roll.

This happened last Friday. I came in to work early this week and found a Chinese food menu strategically placed on my office door. Is it a coincidence that someone wanted to share a Chinese food menu with me this week? Maybe. Am i being harassed? Possibly. Would they do this to me if I was noticeably Asian? Probably not.

I don't really understand why it's still acceptable in American culture to mock Asian Americans? Do people not realize the racism here because Asian Americans are the "model minority?" They supposedly have assimilated into American culture better than any other minority group and thus discrimination does not affect them? Or is it because the American stereotype of Asian Americans as "docile" is so prevalent that people think it is acceptable to discriminate a group of people that are "too well mannered" to speak up?

For reference, some truths about Chinese food, Americans, and discrimination all brought to you through a TED talk...

Horse Herstory

Filly Rachel Alexandra, the first female horse to be entered in the Preakness Stakes, is making history (and a lot of controversy).


Regardless of how you feel about horse races, at least the girls are getting a chance in the sport, and kicking some boy horse butt! ;)

Feminist Label

Where is there room for me, a white woman who stands firmly for equality and acknowledges the discrimination within feminism, and is committed to pointing out and relinquishing (white, cis, able, hetero, and class) privilege? I want to identify with a feminism willing to embrace all people and challenge preconceived notions of what and who "is" and "isn't" feminist, one focused on celebrating diversity and learning for everyone's experiences. Where do i fit? Because i'm a bit confused these days.

Please read these two posts by Renee prior to responding...
Womanist Musings: I am not a Feminist
Womanist Musings: Can a White Woman be a Womanist?

I agree with commenter "juju" who said "ultimately, the work that you do is much more important than the label you wear, and you should just call yourself whatever works for you and continue doing the work." I understand and agree with focusing on activism but often identity fuels a social movement and propels it forward with greater force. I would hate our progress and activism to slow because we're too busy focusing on what our identity should be.

I wrote about this a bit in my "I'm not a feminist, but" post: George Washington University’s Dr. Zucker (2004) published a study addressing this. Dr. Zucker’s research explored women disavowing social identities and found that in the 272 women surveyed, self-identifying as feminists was a predictor of feminist activism. Herein lies my concern. On one hand, I don’t care if you identity as a feminist or not, as long as you retain feminist beliefs. On the other hand, if self-identifying as a feminist is going to make you more of an activist, then it matters.

Quick Hit: Women Bullying Women at Work

As a possible bit of a follow up to my post on female bullying, my wonderful sister in law sent me this article that i will pass on to all of you. However, i will disclaimer it with the fact that i didn't get a chance to read it carefully yet or do an analysis. Feel free to leave your feedback to the piece in comments.

Tyra Takes on Same Sex Marriage

I have a hard time talking with people who believe sexual orientation is a choice. Literally, i shut down and am unable to further "debate" with them about rights because i recognize that they see gays and lesbians as "lesser than," "other," and nothing i say will ever change their mind. I am all for tolerating opinions different from my own but this isn't a topic i can tolerate a range of values on because for me, it's so basic and so essential. Denying someone human rights because you think their sexuality is something they should "control" or something they can "change" is absurd. Did you wake up one morning and "decide" to be straight? Seriously, is this something you thought about and made a conscious decision on? No.

Tyra Banks did an episode yesterday that i want to post here, because i thought a lot of it was really good. But more than that, it presents a very real display of bigotry, intolerance, and people who claim to be "Christians" when in fact they are just using the bible as an excuse to hate, which is very very not Christian of them. They are the same people who think homosexuality is a choice and a sin. For example, in one of the segments the woman says, "I see emotional and mental instability" as one of the audience members emotionally shares the discrimination and violence he has faced in his life for his sexual orientation. She does not show empathy, she does not show love or support. She laughs, on stage, and tells the world he's emotionally and mentally instable. Shame on you, lady.

Tyra had Sandy Rios on (who IS this woman?!) who had lots of quotable gems, such as:

"You can stop being gay, you cannot stop being black"

"As a fully heterosexual female i can tell you how difficult it is not to have sex, too. So i can understand that dilemma" She was asked, "is celebacy the answer?" Her reply: "yes, as apposed to acting out homosexuality or adultry or pedophelia, yes.

"When you talk about discrimination and the misery of being a lesbian, gay upfront is the wrong name for that. It's broken hearts, it's disease, it's unnatural." (just for the record, the woman she was talking to never said being a lesbian made her miserable...)


If you have time, and can tolerate Tyra, watch the show, "Gay is the New Black." If nothing else I want you to see the "arguments" that same sex marriage opponents make. I want you to hear the intolerance, bigotry, and hatred that they spew and I want you to see exactly why i have such an unbelievable difficult time "debating" with people like this in my own life. Primarily because there is nothing i can say that will ever make them hate less, love more, and celebrate diversity.

I posted it here from youtube which had it split up into four video. I only included the last part of the show because that's the one that had a lot of what i discussed above:



Just don't read the comments on youtube, or else you're get lots like this one:

Ginne86 (12 minutes ago)
"Being gay IS a choice, just like fat people can choose to eat fast food or you can choose to eat healthy. even though healthy food dont tastes as good as fast foods."

Friday Feel Good: Obama's New Budget ELIMINATES Abstinence-Only Funding!

Quick hit via Amplify Your Voice:

Barack Obama just released the numbers for his new 2010 budget, and while everything in it isn’t peachy, I have some great news for you:

Abstinence-only funding has been ELIMINATED.

Community Based Abstinence Education funding is GONE.

Title V abstinence-only funding is GONE.

Not only are all of the abstinence-only funds eliminated, but $173 million dollars will now be going to teen pregnancy prevention programs around the country that don’t have to adhere to the ridiculous standards that were there before.

More info on the good and the bad at Amplify Your Voice, Female Impersonator, and Feministe

Wesleyan Feminist Shot & Killed Yesterday

I received an email yesterday at work entitled, "Shooting on Broad Street- Read this message NOW." I didn't think much of it, because i work off-site in New Haven and not in Middletown where my company's building is located. The email read:

Important Notice

There was a shooting at the Red and Black Café today, located at the corner of Broad & Williams Streets. Midfield received incorrect information from the authorities. The shooter WAS NOT apprehended. The Corporate Center is now in "lock down". No one may enter the building but employees may leave the building.

Summary:
A Wesleyan student was fatally shot at Red and Black Café this afternoon. . A gun was recovered at the scene of the shooting, however the suspect is still at large.

Today I learned that the victim was Johanna Justin-Jinich, a Wesleyan student who volunteered for Planned Parenthood and was an activist for women's issues and public health. "She was supposed to work in DC this summer for a women’s rights organization." The police are unsure whether the suspect, Stephen Morgan, targeted Johanna because she was Jewish or if it was personal. They had attended a program together at NYU and towards the end of it Johanna filed a harassment complaint with the Public Safety Department, saying she had been receiving harassing e-mails and phone calls from Stephen. She later decided not to pursue the case. Yesterday morning Stephen walked into the cafe where Johanna worked and shot her. She will be greatly missed. This is really a devastating loss. My heart goes out to her friends and family.

EDIT: Dave tells me they haven't yet caught the suspect :/ Anyone else know more about this??

Women's Martial Arts, an Interview

Below is an interview with a female martial artist, Marianna, who has been studying martial arts for almost 15 years. She is now getting into MMA (Mixed Martial Arts), where there are not currently a lot of women. You will see in the interview below that Marianna was supported to persue her interests in martial arts early on with the support of her dad who enrolled her in classes when she was nine years old. In the interest of full disclosure, I will tell you that Marianna is my cousin and i am incredibly proud of her for all her accomplishments and goals. She does not only demonstrate physical strength but also strength of character, as martial arts have taught her to over the last 15 years.

Some of the gender questions that came to mind as i watched Marianna's fight included: What kind of messages do the women holding up signs in the middle of the fight (and the photo op with the same women at the end) send? They are almost naked and we as feminists quickly notice this sort of blatant objectification. Shouldn't a female fight, with an empowerment and strength focus, send a different message and leave out this sexist tradition from the ring? Another question that arose for me was whether there are certain double standards for women in the sport. Do they expect the women to be feminine and conventionally attractive while maintaining a "tough guy" attitude? Which female fighters get more attention (in terms of fans and sponsorship) the conventionally pretty women or the women who look tough, ready to kick ass, and are unmotivated by maintaining a conventionally feminine appearance?

If you have questions for Marianna about martial arts and MMA, feel free to leave them in the comment section, maybe i can get her to swing by and answer some :)




1. What made you want to learn and start practicing martial arts?
I've been doing martial arts since i was 9 years old. My brother was taking Tae Kwon Do and I was always intrigued by it so my dad let me start taking classes. Then after i got my black belt my dad encouraged me to look around at other schools and that's when i started taking kung fu with Vincent Lyn. I trained with him for 6 years before moving to Miami for college. I took some time off from the martial arts at that point. A year ago I decided I wanted to get back into it. I looked for serious schools before finding out that one of the best MMA camps in the world was just around the corner from my house. I joined American Top Team and couldn't be happier with the training. I am pushed every day and find the sport to be so challenging. (MMA is the combination of wrestling, jiu jitsu, boxing and kickboxing).

2. Did knowing how to fight throughout your life make you feel more safe in situations where women are "supposed to" be afraid, like walking alone at night or meeting men for the first time?
Actually, I've never been in a real fight. I do feel safe knowing that i have experience in combat but now-a -days people don't really fight with just fists...so i think i've just been fortunate not having to prove myself on the street.

3. What types of double standards have you experienced or seen in the world of MMA in terms of gender?
I've always been more of a tom boy than a girly girl growing up. Sports were always part of my life and I've had to deal with criticism from family and a few friends about how girls shouldn't be playing sports and instead being girly. But thankfully i've never been the type of person to take things personally. I enjoy being challenged physically and this is what this sport does. Fighting is just as mental as it is physical so i feel that it sort of mirrors life. You have to be strong physically, mentally and spiritually to make it through daily struggles and the same goes for MMA.

I like to prove people wrong. I think girl fighters can definitely be sexy. Why not be the total package? Yea i'm a girl, yes i can fight and yes i'm sexy. I don't think those aspects have to contradict themselves. Actually a lot of guys think that girl fighters are hot. After my fight I got a lot of feedback from some spectators. They all showed me a lot of love and respect and these were people who didn't even know me. They just came up to me and told me what they thought.

As far as body image... the sport is very demanding (that's why you see so many hot guys with amazing bodies fighting). I'm noticing my body change and a lot of people don't realize the sacrifice on your body. Fighters are constantly loosing and gaining depending on timing of fights. So it definitely keeps you in shape and I love that about it!

4. Do you think it's harder for women fighters to get noticed than male fighters? Is it more difficult for female fighters to get sponsorship?
I think it's easier. People always talk about the girl fights! I think being an attractive girl opens doors because sex sells. Just look at Gina Carano. She's an awesome fighter and shes hot. she's the most popular female fighter in the world (but not because she's hands down the best in the world). What sets her apart is her looks. I am a huge fan of hers...she's got a lot of sponsors, she keeps it real and she's not afraid to be sexy.

5. What is some advice you'd give to girls and women starting out in martial arts?
Martial arts are great because it's a great workout, you get to meet a lot of nice people, you will challenge yourself mentally and physically and it's fun to learn. I am totally for strong women and I think women that do martial arts gain confidence in more than just protecting themselves. But as far as women's MMA, it's gaining popularity by the minute. like I said...people love to watch women fight. So i doubt the sport is going anywhere.

6. Why does the ref keep fixing your bra during the fight? I thought that was a bit strange...
Ok so i was planning on wearing my t-shirt the whole fight. When i got into the ring they told me it wasn't tight enough and my opponent's feet could get caught in it so they made me take it off. The problem with that was that I had plastic boob protectors in my sports bra (which is required to wear...as well as its required to take a pregnancy test before fights). So during the fight the boob protectors kept shifting and at some points sticking out of the sports bra. So the ref kept fixing and adjusting it for me. LOL. quite embarrassing but at least they didn't fall out!!