Wednesday, October 1, 2008

Follow Up to my Sexism Masked as Tradition Post

Back in July I wrote about a coworker who was upset with his wife for being pregnant with a girl. I wrote how unfortunate it was for him to be disappointed with his future daughter before she's even born and at his wife for something that the sperm have more "control" over than the egg. I also wrote about the degree of sexism that still exists (in my peers no less!) masked as "tradition."

Today this same coworker's client came into their counseling session with a new baby boy. In the hallway (right outside my door), the counselor said, "Congrats on having a boy!" to his client. The client replied, "I heard you are a new dad too, congrats to you as well." The counselor explained, "Nah man, no congrats here. I had a girl. I wish i had a boy. I just shot and missed, ya know? haha. Hopefully next time."

I thought after his daughter was born he'd change his tune. Nope, guess not. Poor girl.



10 comments:

frau sally benz said...

That's so sad! Don't people realize that part of the issue is their own thinking? If you feel that way about your daughter, then she will realize it sooner or later, and your problems can only get worse from there.

Sabertooth Screaming Lemur said...

What. a. douche.
I feel so bad for this guy's daughter. Actually I hope he doesn't have a son ever, because he'd be sure to show preference, making his daughter really confused and unhappy. Maybe it's unfair of me to assume, but I still hope he only has daughters. Maybe he'll grow to like them. Hope his wife is a really strong, loving mom.

Smirking Cat said...

What a complete ass. So instead of changing sexist traditions (taking male last names, passing money and property to males, etc.), just hate your baby girl? I would have to seriously consider leaving him if I was the mother. That is a destructive attitude for a father to have, period, but particularly about his own child.

Kandee said...

Why is he with a woman then if he hates females so much? I never will understand that.

Habladora said...

Wow, what a disturbing story. Some of the coolest women I know are the daughters of complete assholes, though, so she still has a chance. How do you even manage to talk to this guy without screaming?

phd in yogurtry said...

And he's a counselor? Man, where do you go with that?

DJ Dual Core said...

Has he any clue about the effect his attitude will have on his daughter? How about the woman he's married to?

How did this guy get a job working with people?

FeministGal said...

Oh i hear ya'll... there have been many a staff meeting where i had to hold my tongue for things he said. The clinic was in desperate need of counselors a few months ago at which point they made several poor hiring decisions, he just happens to be one that's still here... hopefully he'll learn, because it is tough being a substance abuse counselor and those who are willing to do it are few and far in between... hopefully he'll learn... for now, it's difficult to say the least haha

Renee said...

That is so incredibly sad. I also don't understand how you can hold your child and not be overwhelmed with love. The best days of my life were the days that my two sons were born. it had nothing to do with their gender but everything to do with the fact that I was so greatful that they were healthy. To this day I still get lost in their big brown eyes.
I feel sorry for his little girl. She is going to have a very rough childhood with a father that does not value her and love her unconditionally.

Anonymous said...

urrrghhh that is a horrifying story! what an idiot...